10,000 Jokes Thread !

[amanwadhwa]

Once a doctor went to a mental hospital. he was walking by a room and saw a guy holding his ear to the wall, so the doc went to that guy and pushed him aside and tried to listen so the doc put his ear against the wall and said i don't hear anything. that guy slaped the doctor and said i'm listening to this wall for 20 years i don't hear anything you just came and how the hell can you hear something.

 

[amanwadhwa]

Santa and Banta opened a restaurant and placed a sign outside the restaurant - Closed 4 hours a day.
Simply because they knew numbering up to 3 only.

 

[amanwadhwa]

A man walks into the bar really depressed.
The bartender asks him what his problem is.
“My dog just died and the damn vet charged me Rs 10,500.”
Says the bartender: “Wow, that is pretty high. What did the vet do?”
“Not much. I took the dog in there and told him, you got to help him Doc, this is the best dog I have ever had. The vet pokes at him for a few minutes and says, ‘I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do.’ I said ‘Come on doc, this is my best dog, there’s got to be something you can do.’ The vet says, ‘OK, we can try one more thing.’ He goes over to this cage and grabs this cat and brings it over to the dog and swings it around the dog’s head. The vet says, ‘sorry but he’s gone. That’ll be Rs 10,500.’ I said, ‘What! Rs 10,500 to declare the dog dead?” He says, ‘Yeah. Rs 500 for the office visit and Rs 10,000 for the CAT scan.”

 

[amanwadhwa]

A man walks into the bar really depressed.
The bartender asks him what his problem is.
“My dog just died and the damn vet charged me Rs 10,500.”
Says the bartender: “Wow, that is pretty high. What did the vet do?”
“Not much. I took the dog in there and told him, you got to help him Doc, this is the best dog I have ever had. The vet pokes at him for a few minutes and says, ‘I’m sorry, there’s nothing I can do.’ I said ‘Come on doc, this is my best dog, there’s got to be something you can do.’ The vet says, ‘OK, we can try one more thing.’ He goes over to this cage and grabs this cat and brings it over to the dog and swings it around the dog’s head. The vet says, ‘sorry but he’s gone. That’ll be Rs 10,500.’ I said, ‘What! Rs 10,500 to declare the dog dead?” He says, ‘Yeah. Rs 500 for the office visit and Rs 10,000 for the CAT scan.”

 

[Royal_Punjaban]

boy: dear luk into ma eyes.What u c?

Grl: true love

Boy:OYE!Aida wada machar nazar ni aaya?
true love di lagdi.
Kad cheti......

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

hello to all

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

What Will Happen If


Bipasha Basu,


Mallika Sherawat,


Neha Dupia,


Rakhi Sawant


Contest Elections In India.?

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

Girl:Bas bi karo ab! Boy:Kuch bi nahi hota! Grl:Kisi ne dekh lia to? Boy:Kuch nahi hoga bus seedhi raho aur thora khol kar rakho! Girl:Bus bohat ho gaya ab main tumhein aur nahien karney doongi! Boy: Please thora sa aur karney do! . . . Agar aj paper na kar saka to mein Fail ho jaon ga!!!

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

Mat puch sms ki inteha kahan tak hy, Tu kanjusi kar le teri taqat jahan tak hy, SMS ki umid humen nahi tujh se, Humen to dekhna hai tu kanjus kahan tak hy,

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

BULBUL KA BCHA khata tha khichri, peeta tha pani, BUL BUL KA BCHA gaata tha gany, mery sarhany, BUL BUL KA BCHA ek din uraya, wapis na aya, KUTTEY KA BACHA!

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

1 Zardari ko dekha to aisa laga
Jese khana kharab,
Jese total azaab,
Jesey Aadi faqeer,
Jesay murda zameer,
Jese Naasoor ho koii sartaa howaa,
Ek zardari ko dekha to aisa laga,
Jese bijli ka taar
Jese khanjar ki dhaar,
Jesey dozakh ki aag,
Jesey zehrila naag,
Jese garmi ki dhoop
Jese shetan ka roop

 

[mhsn_sadiq]

Ab Full corruption ki bari hai,
Q k ab daur-e-zardari hai,
Ab lootna maal sarkari hai,
Q k ab daur-e-zardari hai,
Ab aap ki izzat aapki apni zimmadari hai,
Q k izzat ka shikari Asif Ali zardari hai,
Ab photi Qismat hamari hai,
Q k ab nawaz sharif ka bhai Asif Ali zardari hai,

 

[amanwadhwa]

Boy: I am not rich like rohit, I don't even have a bid car like rohit. But I really love you!
Girl: I love you too, but tell me more about rohit..

 

[amanwadhwa]

Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?
Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.

 

[amanwadhwa]

n a train, ticket checker to a saint: Ticket please!
Saint: I don't have.
TT: Where do you want to go?
Saint: Lord Ram's birth place, Ayodhya!
TT: Come, lets go!
Saint: Where?
TT: Lord Krishna'a birth place, Jail.

 

[amanwadhwa]

Commerce professor asks the student: what is the most important source of finance for starting business?

Student: "Father in law".

 

[amanwadhwa]

An englishman, bihari & punjabi were standing on roof. They decided to throw down whatever was available in excess with them.
Englishman threw pounds, Bihari threw rice & Punjabi threw the Bihari down.

 

[amanwadhwa]

An engineering student to his sweeper brother: I have got degree, I have got knowledge, I can sit in society. What do you have?
Sweeper: I have the job.

 

[amanwadhwa]

Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.