prisoners of war


Prime VIP
Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering
whom to invade

next when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, Mr. Hussein!" a heavily accented voice said,
"This is Gurmukh

from Phagwara, District Kapurthala. I am ringing to
inform you that we

are officially declaring the war on you!"

"Well, Gurmukh," Saddam replied, "This is indeed
important news!

How big is your army"

"Right now," said Gurmukh, after a moment's
calculation, "there is

myself, my cousin Sukhdev, my next door neighbour
Bhagat, and the

entire kabaddi team from the gurudwara. That makes

Saddam paused. "I must tell you, Gurmukh that I have
one million men in

my army waiting to move on my command."

"Arrey O! Main kya.. " said Gurmukh. "I'll have to
ring you back!"

Sure enough, the next day, Gurmukh called again.

"Mr. Hussein, it is Gurmukh, I'm call ing from
Phagwara STD, the war is

still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry

"And what equipment would that be, Gurmukh" Saddam

"Well, we have two combines, a donkey and Amrik's

Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Gurmukh, that I have
16,000 tanks

and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I've
increased my army to

1-1/2 million since we last spoke."

"Oh teri ....." said Gurmukh. "I'll have to get back
to you."

Sure enough, Gurmukh rang again the next day.

"Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to
get ourselves

airborne...... We've modified Amrik's tractor by
adding a couple of

shotguns, sticking on some wings and the pind's
generator. Four school pass

boys from Malpur have joined us as well!"

Saddam was silent for a minute and then cleared his
throat. "I must

tell you, Gurmukh, that I have 10,000 bombers and
20,000 fighter

planes.My military complex is surro unded by
laser-guided, surface-to-air

missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've
increased my army to TWO


"Tera pala hove...." said Gurmuk, "I'll have to ring
you back."

Sure enough, Gurmukh called again the next day.
"Kiddan, Mr.

Hussein! I am sorry to tell you that we have had to
call off the


"I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam. "Why the
sudden change of


"Well," said Gurmukh, "we've all had a long chat over
a couple of

lassi's, and decided there's no way we can feed two

prisoners of wars