HR's Love letter


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How a HR writes love letter

Dear Miss _ _ _ _ _ _ _ ,

I am very pleased to inform you that with reference to your profile
sent to us a few days back and the subsequent meetings and the
discussions conducted at the near by garden on 12 of june at 1400 Hrs. ,
it is hereby informed that you are selected and offered with the
designation junior girl friend ( trainee ) in our esteemed organization
" My Heart " with the agreed remuneration details as described at the
last section of the mail text.
You are requested to join duty on or before 28.6.2005 at 9 am at
Leisure Valley, CHANDIGARH.
As discussed earlier and agreed upon by both the sides it is here
by confirmed that any notice period due paid to your previous
boyfriend or deducted from your assets / Gifts while returning
from your previous boy friend will be reimbursed by our organization
" My Heart " on submission of necessary documents / Proofs .
Items like Love letters / flowers / buckets / rings of gold of
or above 24 carrots only / Gift pack with cover on which date and
rate mentioned / restaurant bills / Disco theque or movie tickets /
Evidences of tender coconut enjoyed together will be strictly
debarred off as per the reimbursement policies and guidelines set
by " My Heart ".
As per the company guidelines Our love affair would be on probation
for a period of six months during which your importance to my heart
will be measured . The Parameters set for measurement are your
performance level , Quality and duration of love , Punctuality
during datings , cost of gifts /quality , Uniform during romance /
Manners and etiquette at the time when I will be late during datings,
maintenance of distance from other handsome guys during our affair.
On successful completion of probation for a period of six months and
depending on your Performance Appraisal ratings and compatibility,
you will be offered with permanent Employment in " My Heart " and you
will be projected on job training and performance appraisal schemes
leading up to promotion form lover to spouse. The training Schedule
includes several sittings on
" How to be a better girlfriend "
" tricks and techniques of Success in Love "
" How to find out nukes and disadvantages of a Boy friend and Ignore
them " ( Indigenously designed and developed )
Few crash courses on " how to deal effectively with other girls related
to your boy Friend " and " Smart ways of facing situations like Struggle
for Existence and Survival of the Fittest techniques with your Boyfriends "
The expenses incurred for coffee / Movie / Tender coconut and entertainment
would initially be shared equally between us. Later on based upon your
performance, I might take up a larger share a part of the expenses.
However I am broad minded enough to be taken care of, on your expenses account
Here by it is to request you to kindly respond within 7 days of receiving
this letter, failing which, this offer would be canceled with / with out
further notice and I shall be considering someone else with similar skill
set and experience level for the same vacancy . I would be happy, if you
could forward this letter to your sister / Friend / Previous Boy Friend's
Previous Girl Friend / All of the above , if you do not decide to take up
this offer . Upon successful selection of any Girls referred by you , you
will be Compensated with price worth of one month Expenditure to be spent
on that girl as my new girl friend .
Thanking you in anticipation,
Your sincerely,
Your Package
Name : _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Designation : junior girl friend ( trainee )
Experience : 2 guys ( One in city , One academic - during college )
Total gross ( Monthly ) : 3 gifts worth 3000/-
30 bike rides each duration 2 hours
20 trips to FR, gedi route
5 Trips to Iskon Temple
10 Kulfis / Chokobars at a regular gap of 3 days
Daily Provision of samosa / Aloo bhujia / paneer Pakoda worth of 5/-
4 movies ( Hindi Family movie only ) per month on every weekend
Visits to kausali resorts and Digshai every Weekend
Pair of Jeans or T-shirts according to Demand

Net Deductions ( Monthly ) : Provident Fund and Service taxes to be informed on joining


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