Let's face it, english is a stupid language
there is no egg in the eggplant
no ham in the hamburger
and neither pine nor apple in the pineapple
english muffins were not invented in england
french fries were not invented in france
we sometimes take english for granted
but if we examine its paradoxes we find that
quicksand takes you down slowly
boxing rings are square
and a guinea pig is not from guinea nor is it a pig
if writers write, how come that fingers don't fing
if the plural of tooth is teeth
shouldn't be the plural of phone-booth be phone-beeth?
if the teacher taught
why didn't the preacher praught?
if a vegetarian eats vegetables,
what the heck does a humanitarian eat?
why do people recite at a play
and play at a recital?
park on driveways
and drive on parkways?
you have to marvel at the unique lunacy
of a language where a house can burn up as
it burns down
and in which you fill in a form
by filling it out
and a bell is only heard when it goes
english was invented by people, not computers
and it reflects the creativity of the human race
(which ofcourse isn't a race at all)
that is why when the stars are out they are visible
and when the lights are out they are invisible