10 different kinds of species one can encounter in Offices
I belong to the 10th one. What about you ?
1 . The dedicated fresher: An enthusiastic creature. Just out of one ordeal called university, joins work in hopes of a fresh start to their life. Gives their 100% to learning new stuff. Easily threatened and can be literally squeezed for work.
2 . The annoying fresher: “OOOhhh, What does this button do”, “How did you do that?”, “I have never done this before”, “Can I give it a shot?”. Another enthusiastic species, but extremely annoying.
3 . The Veteran: This species would have been around in office since dinosaurs went extinct. They let the rest know about the Golden days of Office, the wonderful team they used to be a part of and how things have changed, mostly not for the good.
4 . The Social Animal: The only reason this creature comes to office is to socialize. You can find them all over the office, meeting fellow kind and other species as well. They discuss “Projects”, Cricket, “Presentations”, Movies, “Clients” etc. If you know what I mean.
5 . The Napper: A descendant of Koala Bears, they spend most of their office hours taking a Power nap. That’s what they like to call it. The only thing power about that is their snoring though.
6 . The Jargonist: This species is usually found at the top of the food chain. They are known to speak in a largely pointless language. Few examples include, “I guess we must escalate this issue”, “Let’s have a brainstorming session”, “That’s a very important Action Item”, “Time for a power nap”.
7 . The Nobody: A very stealthy creature. Spends 8-9 hours in office camouflaged in front of its Computer. Keeps to itself and doesn’t mingle even with its own kind. Whenever In sight, It makes one go “Who on earth is that?”
8 . The Whiner: “Man, I hate this Office”, “How on earth do they expect me to finish this in 1 week”, “The food here sucks”, “The girls are not good looking enough”, “I hate to travel this far”, “I Hate this Job”. Dude, why are you working here then? “Umm, Maybe because I won’t get a job anywhere else?”
9 . The actual Worker: An extremely rare species, whom the Office survives on. They get shit done and get it done before time. More often than not, they don’t get recognized, which makes them slog more. The other 9 creatures rejoice.
10 . The Smartass: Pretends to work hard and is in the good books of everyone who matter. Feeds on the “Actual Worker” and is often the most successful among all species. Goes on to become the “Jargonist”.