How Not To Be Jealous

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Old 29-Mar-2011
How Not To Be Jealous

Jealousy, by all means is futile. What do we stand to gain by being envious of her beautiful eyes or his new sleek Mercedes? Instead of cursing the gods for what you donít have, why not be grateful for what you already have? However, itís easier said than done. Jealousy is innate. We just have to curb for it accomplishes none. Relationships, especially the romantic ones do not exist without a pang of jealousy here and there. The fear of losing a loved one to a new charmer on the block is certainly excruciating and frustrating. Nonetheless, jealousy is greatly induced by insecurities. Just because your girlfriend shared a few giggles with the ladyís man doesnít necessarily mean that she will elope with him on a black horse. A threat to your relationship may be nothing more than an illusion. Bouts of paranoia will only cause your rosy relationship to crumble. Nobody wants to be chaperoned 24/7 and everybody looks forward to their own space. Jealousy is never an attractive trait. Learn a few ways to control your jealousy as you brief through this article.

Ways To Control Jealousy
  • The path of mystery leads inwards. At times, jealousy subconsciously grips you, coercing you to act against your will. A volcanic outburst of stinging emotions triggers irrational images and possibilities in your head. Introspect these feelings and get to the very bottom of them. Nip them in the bud and control your anxiety. Be considerate. Your significant other has a life too!
  • Bite your tongue when the pangs of envy start to kick in. Do not overreact or blindly accuse your partner. Go for a walk and let off some steam before you lose control and do something you might regret. If your partner is talking to someone else, leave them be. Trust your partner as you would expect him or her to trust you.
  • Do not bottle up your emotions. If a seed of suspicion has been planted in your head, donít allow it to sprout. Confront your partner and set things straight. There is no point pursuing a relationship based on zero trust and constant jealousy. Face your fears!
  • Remember that whenever you behave jealously, you are only responding to your personal interpretation of your partnerís behaviour and not the actual behaviour! Take a deep breath, wobble your head till you bounce back to reality and stab the hovering ghost of paranoia. If your Labrador runs towards a stranger in a park and slobbers all over, neither of the two are doing something inherently wrong. Jealousy is just a dismissible state of mind. Dismiss it!
  • Nothing is more effective than building self confidence. Low self-esteem and deeply rooted apprehensions about being abandoned accounts for jealous behaviour. People who feel inadequate firstly need to tackle their insecurities before embarking upon a relationship and burdening the unlucky recipient.
  • Never compare yourself to someone else. Weíre all different. Beethoven was a breathtaking musician, while Lionel Messi was a mind-blowing footballer! Nobody is perfect and nobody is insignificant. Of course, there are degrees of brilliance and you might not be a prodigy. However, your partner loves you for all the traits that can never be found in another individual.
  • Boredom is a pest. And we canít handle it anymore; we turn to our partners (most likely to be on speed dial) to cure it. You might be dismayed to learn that he or she has work commitments and hence cannot attend to your call. It's understandable if you want to spend a certain amount of quality time with your partner, child, parent, or friend. However, they have their own obligations to fulfil. Of course, you have to right to panic if they do not spend any time with you! However, cut them some slack and do not be jealous if they spend more time with a new comrade. Itís probably temporary!

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