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Hai hukku hai hukku hai hai
Ek ladki mere saamne mere dil liye jaay jaay – Gopi Kishan
As if having Suniel Shetty in the lead wasn’t enough torture for the audience, he was made to shake his booty alongside tomboyish Karisma and crudely dressed dancers of multihued clothing. Mr. Shetty, hands in his pockets and sporting a huge baggy shirt embellished by bold inscription “SODA”, strikes a scornfully pitiable picture while straining to lift his limbs and keep up to the rhythm. And all this just when I had forgiven him for his Jhanjariya teri chanak gayi efforts.
Padosan apni murgi ko rakhna sambhal
Mera murga hua hein diwana – Jadugar
What on Earth is Amitabh Bachchan doing in this song? How boorish can it get chasing Jayaprada with lewd gestures and suggestive lyrics? And what uncouth dress sense for a Hyderabadi is that... a half-tied lungi, may-drop-anytime line moustache and kohl for the eyes?? Funny, very funny!!
Jab tak rahega samose mein Aloo
Tera rahoonga oh meri Shaloo – Mr. & Mrs. Khiladi
Ok, we understand Akshay Kumar and Juhi Chawla are very lovey dovey couple, singing a duet on their suhaag raat. But pray why those jumping kicks, reverse back rolls, striking hip thrusts and frenzied bouts of hysterical prancing shaking the cots, lights and even the very foundation of the movie set.
Ek garam chai ki pyaali ho
Koi usko pilanewali ho.. – some David Dawan crappy movie.
Even as I was learning to endure a shirtless Salman the hard way, he goes a step closer to Full Monty stripping all but for the briefest of a Brief. Anu Malik’s screeching for playback and Sallu miya in miniature version of Adam’s Fig Leaf shrugging shoulders and hip joints and clinging to a line of gynandromorphous supermodels, make this song an explicit torment targeted at the unsuspecting audience. But this is nothing new for Salman. Catch him with Shilpa Shetty doing, Apni toh ek hi life ek hi life ek hi life, rona dona baba i dont like i dont like in Auzaar, in the shortest of the short chaddis.
Lagan lagan lagan lagan teri lagan lagi – Tere Naam
And when Salman is not giving a complex to the Chandni Bar striptease, he is busy watching his toupee. This particular song has added four moons (chaar chand lagaya) in his already much accomplished dancing abilities where he excels moving his feet and hands in a semicircular gyratory motion, all the while maintaining a perfect posture so as not to disturb a single hair on that funny looking wig he dons. Also, no words suffice to eulogize the wig designer of this movie that has convincingly managed to give a Halloween makeover for one of the better-looking actors in the industry.
Taana tandana, Main hoon deewana – Insaaf
Another Hair-raising song! Akshay and Shilpa strutting their bellies forward and swinging hips go about playing tabla on the baldpate scalps of men or pulling pigtails of gray-headed women. Still can’t figure out whether it’s supposed to be a jocular song or any deeper meaning is conveyed in doing so. May be I lack the aesthetic sense of observation much needed to understand, enjoy and appreciate such songs.
Aata hein, chawal hein, daal hein, something hein
par choolha nahi... badi mushkil hein.. – Jhoot bole kauwa kaate
A bizarre song starring Anil Kapoor, Juhi Chawla, Anupam Kher and Saajid Khan. I mean.. THE obnoxious Saajid Khan. Oh God, imagine that abhorrent Saajid Khan.. and need I say anything more?!
Haathon mein aa gaya jo kal, rumaal aap kaa, bechain kar gaya hume,
khayal aap ka.. ting .. ting ting.. ting ting ting – Aao Pyar Karen
A pre-Dillagi Saif Ali Khan and a post-Baazigar Shilpa Shetty in some hanky panky over a silly hankie. Not that there have been no songs on handkerchiefs in Bollywood (see Aamir in Sarfarosh), but Saif and Shilpa endorsing Colgate Gel toothpaste, grinning their 32+ denture wide and wild, playing hopscotch and jutting their necks rhythmically is the specialty of this particular song.
Baandhi kamariya se sari, ke aayi ab aunty ki baari.. – Aunty No.1
Just see Govinda in a lady’s get-up. Let alone resembling a woman, he doesn’t even remotely look like an-insult-of-a-eunuch! I bet Kader Khan was still suffering from that 6pm night blindness else I don’t see a reason for his drooling over a heavy built, badly cross-dressed Govinda parading outrageous mannerism.
Saawan ka mahina, shaadi bina mushkil hein jeena – Hulchul
The Devgans at their horrible worst! Kajol and Ajay doing an Arabic danse du ventre in a badly lit discotheque wearing bright flashy waistcoats, pajamas and long headscarves. Ajay is tolerable as long as he keeps his face straight or bland, but he brings down the house the moment he grins wide and flaunts expressions ala Madhuri Dixit in Ek do teen style. Another similar mention would be their “Main tere man ki myna hoti tu mere man ka tota hua hua pyaar hua”
romancing, shrieking and sashaying on Mumbai Roads in some C grade movie.
Ek ladki mere saamne mere dil liye jaay jaay – Gopi Kishan
As if having Suniel Shetty in the lead wasn’t enough torture for the audience, he was made to shake his booty alongside tomboyish Karisma and crudely dressed dancers of multihued clothing. Mr. Shetty, hands in his pockets and sporting a huge baggy shirt embellished by bold inscription “SODA”, strikes a scornfully pitiable picture while straining to lift his limbs and keep up to the rhythm. And all this just when I had forgiven him for his Jhanjariya teri chanak gayi efforts.
Padosan apni murgi ko rakhna sambhal
Mera murga hua hein diwana – Jadugar
What on Earth is Amitabh Bachchan doing in this song? How boorish can it get chasing Jayaprada with lewd gestures and suggestive lyrics? And what uncouth dress sense for a Hyderabadi is that... a half-tied lungi, may-drop-anytime line moustache and kohl for the eyes?? Funny, very funny!!
Jab tak rahega samose mein Aloo
Tera rahoonga oh meri Shaloo – Mr. & Mrs. Khiladi
Ok, we understand Akshay Kumar and Juhi Chawla are very lovey dovey couple, singing a duet on their suhaag raat. But pray why those jumping kicks, reverse back rolls, striking hip thrusts and frenzied bouts of hysterical prancing shaking the cots, lights and even the very foundation of the movie set.
Ek garam chai ki pyaali ho
Koi usko pilanewali ho.. – some David Dawan crappy movie.
Even as I was learning to endure a shirtless Salman the hard way, he goes a step closer to Full Monty stripping all but for the briefest of a Brief. Anu Malik’s screeching for playback and Sallu miya in miniature version of Adam’s Fig Leaf shrugging shoulders and hip joints and clinging to a line of gynandromorphous supermodels, make this song an explicit torment targeted at the unsuspecting audience. But this is nothing new for Salman. Catch him with Shilpa Shetty doing, Apni toh ek hi life ek hi life ek hi life, rona dona baba i dont like i dont like in Auzaar, in the shortest of the short chaddis.
Lagan lagan lagan lagan teri lagan lagi – Tere Naam
And when Salman is not giving a complex to the Chandni Bar striptease, he is busy watching his toupee. This particular song has added four moons (chaar chand lagaya) in his already much accomplished dancing abilities where he excels moving his feet and hands in a semicircular gyratory motion, all the while maintaining a perfect posture so as not to disturb a single hair on that funny looking wig he dons. Also, no words suffice to eulogize the wig designer of this movie that has convincingly managed to give a Halloween makeover for one of the better-looking actors in the industry.
Taana tandana, Main hoon deewana – Insaaf
Another Hair-raising song! Akshay and Shilpa strutting their bellies forward and swinging hips go about playing tabla on the baldpate scalps of men or pulling pigtails of gray-headed women. Still can’t figure out whether it’s supposed to be a jocular song or any deeper meaning is conveyed in doing so. May be I lack the aesthetic sense of observation much needed to understand, enjoy and appreciate such songs.
Aata hein, chawal hein, daal hein, something hein
par choolha nahi... badi mushkil hein.. – Jhoot bole kauwa kaate
A bizarre song starring Anil Kapoor, Juhi Chawla, Anupam Kher and Saajid Khan. I mean.. THE obnoxious Saajid Khan. Oh God, imagine that abhorrent Saajid Khan.. and need I say anything more?!
Haathon mein aa gaya jo kal, rumaal aap kaa, bechain kar gaya hume,
khayal aap ka.. ting .. ting ting.. ting ting ting – Aao Pyar Karen
A pre-Dillagi Saif Ali Khan and a post-Baazigar Shilpa Shetty in some hanky panky over a silly hankie. Not that there have been no songs on handkerchiefs in Bollywood (see Aamir in Sarfarosh), but Saif and Shilpa endorsing Colgate Gel toothpaste, grinning their 32+ denture wide and wild, playing hopscotch and jutting their necks rhythmically is the specialty of this particular song.
Baandhi kamariya se sari, ke aayi ab aunty ki baari.. – Aunty No.1
Just see Govinda in a lady’s get-up. Let alone resembling a woman, he doesn’t even remotely look like an-insult-of-a-eunuch! I bet Kader Khan was still suffering from that 6pm night blindness else I don’t see a reason for his drooling over a heavy built, badly cross-dressed Govinda parading outrageous mannerism.
Saawan ka mahina, shaadi bina mushkil hein jeena – Hulchul
The Devgans at their horrible worst! Kajol and Ajay doing an Arabic danse du ventre in a badly lit discotheque wearing bright flashy waistcoats, pajamas and long headscarves. Ajay is tolerable as long as he keeps his face straight or bland, but he brings down the house the moment he grins wide and flaunts expressions ala Madhuri Dixit in Ek do teen style. Another similar mention would be their “Main tere man ki myna hoti tu mere man ka tota hua hua pyaar hua”
romancing, shrieking and sashaying on Mumbai Roads in some C grade movie.
