Punjabi Gabru
Elite
Tees Maar Khan: Movie Review
Tees Maar Khan (TMK) deceives the audience on two counts. Firstly, by claiming to be a funny movie. If you've seen the promos, you know the brand of humour (or lack of it) that the film rides on. Secondly by under-playing Akshay Khanna's refreshingly side-splitting performance. Yes, you read right, Khanna not Kumar. Kumar is his usual 'I-scream-so-I-am-funny' self. And what works for the film (and the possibly the only thing that does) is how it mocks Bollywood cliches, something director Farah Khan does very well. And perhaps, the most optimal usage of Sheila's flexible waist.
As the name suggests, the film is about the sharpest conman of all, Tabrez Mirza Khan (Akshay Kumar), who is almost always referred to as the title of the film with much enthusiasm and a minimum of two metaphors to describe his talents. And that is exactly what most of the film is about- bragging about TMK, usually by his three sidekicks. But when it comes to the business of conning, it's all talk and no sock! And Khan's narcissism peaks when he begins referring to himself in third-person while gloating about his feats.
The film's story is a wriggly mess woven by Shirish Kunder, written possibly after the film had been shot. But you can't blame him for ignoring one department. After all, he has only a dozen credits in the film (background score, screenplay, story, editing, refreshments on the sets etc). So what begins as a biopic on Khan, gradually becomes the story of the great train robbery after conjoined cons, played by MTV's twin baldies, Raghu and Rajiv, assign him to retrieve their loot which the government had seized. And it's a train robbery because the government was transporting this loot by rail. Khan's great plan: pretend to shoot a patriotic train robbery film, while managing the act for real. Ho-hum. Khan also picks a village and casts its inhabitants to act in his film (and consequently perform the misdeed). Now, this is when the film becomes mildly hilarious as Khan also casts celebrated yet frustrated actor Atish Kapoor (Akshay Khanna), an Oscar-hungry actor whose only mission in life is to groove on the 'Day-Ho' number (similar to Anil Kapoor's joyous leap of glee on 'Jai-ho' when he was called to receive one of the Oscars for Slumdog). Kapoor's character passionately spoofs almost every present-day-Bollywood-actor who aspires to make it in the west, complete with loud hamming and illusions of grandeur. Anya (Katrina Kaif), a struggling actress and Khan's girlfriend is also cast in his film and her role is the film is as questionable as her role in TMK. While the fake film is being shot, she appears in every scene to enquire what she could do in it. And that is exactly her state in this film, no one knows what is the purpose of her role, apart from looking like a tart and belly dancing to Sheila ki jawani. And you can't cast her waist without the rest of her, I guess?
The film plants several unnecessary situations and bizarre characters which don't make the film more amusing or entertaining but add to the runtime as they beg for justifiable screen space. These include the random village folk who are all a part of Khan's fake film, the worst of the lot being Arya Babbar (village cop with dreams of stardom) and Avtar Gill (random blind man in the village). The film also takes a sappy moral turn later (can't we do without it for a change?) as you realise that you've lost your last shred of patience. Luckily, the credits roll soon after.
TMK hops between insufferable and smile-worthy situations. But when you go above and beyond just to construct a gag, it seems forced and out of context and this happens often in TMK. The dialogues are lame and lack wit, punch, drama and everything else one expects from filmy dialogues. Apart from Sheila ki jawani, none of the songs make their mark and would be forgotten before exiting the movie. And exit you will, feeling relieved and a bit cheated over a complete waste of a lovely winter day.
Tees Maar Khan (TMK) deceives the audience on two counts. Firstly, by claiming to be a funny movie. If you've seen the promos, you know the brand of humour (or lack of it) that the film rides on. Secondly by under-playing Akshay Khanna's refreshingly side-splitting performance. Yes, you read right, Khanna not Kumar. Kumar is his usual 'I-scream-so-I-am-funny' self. And what works for the film (and the possibly the only thing that does) is how it mocks Bollywood cliches, something director Farah Khan does very well. And perhaps, the most optimal usage of Sheila's flexible waist.
As the name suggests, the film is about the sharpest conman of all, Tabrez Mirza Khan (Akshay Kumar), who is almost always referred to as the title of the film with much enthusiasm and a minimum of two metaphors to describe his talents. And that is exactly what most of the film is about- bragging about TMK, usually by his three sidekicks. But when it comes to the business of conning, it's all talk and no sock! And Khan's narcissism peaks when he begins referring to himself in third-person while gloating about his feats.
The film's story is a wriggly mess woven by Shirish Kunder, written possibly after the film had been shot. But you can't blame him for ignoring one department. After all, he has only a dozen credits in the film (background score, screenplay, story, editing, refreshments on the sets etc). So what begins as a biopic on Khan, gradually becomes the story of the great train robbery after conjoined cons, played by MTV's twin baldies, Raghu and Rajiv, assign him to retrieve their loot which the government had seized. And it's a train robbery because the government was transporting this loot by rail. Khan's great plan: pretend to shoot a patriotic train robbery film, while managing the act for real. Ho-hum. Khan also picks a village and casts its inhabitants to act in his film (and consequently perform the misdeed). Now, this is when the film becomes mildly hilarious as Khan also casts celebrated yet frustrated actor Atish Kapoor (Akshay Khanna), an Oscar-hungry actor whose only mission in life is to groove on the 'Day-Ho' number (similar to Anil Kapoor's joyous leap of glee on 'Jai-ho' when he was called to receive one of the Oscars for Slumdog). Kapoor's character passionately spoofs almost every present-day-Bollywood-actor who aspires to make it in the west, complete with loud hamming and illusions of grandeur. Anya (Katrina Kaif), a struggling actress and Khan's girlfriend is also cast in his film and her role is the film is as questionable as her role in TMK. While the fake film is being shot, she appears in every scene to enquire what she could do in it. And that is exactly her state in this film, no one knows what is the purpose of her role, apart from looking like a tart and belly dancing to Sheila ki jawani. And you can't cast her waist without the rest of her, I guess?
The film plants several unnecessary situations and bizarre characters which don't make the film more amusing or entertaining but add to the runtime as they beg for justifiable screen space. These include the random village folk who are all a part of Khan's fake film, the worst of the lot being Arya Babbar (village cop with dreams of stardom) and Avtar Gill (random blind man in the village). The film also takes a sappy moral turn later (can't we do without it for a change?) as you realise that you've lost your last shred of patience. Luckily, the credits roll soon after.
TMK hops between insufferable and smile-worthy situations. But when you go above and beyond just to construct a gag, it seems forced and out of context and this happens often in TMK. The dialogues are lame and lack wit, punch, drama and everything else one expects from filmy dialogues. Apart from Sheila ki jawani, none of the songs make their mark and would be forgotten before exiting the movie. And exit you will, feeling relieved and a bit cheated over a complete waste of a lovely winter day.
