Finding Myself

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Old 18-Oct-2010
Finding Myself

I sit and wonder,
If maybe I shouldn't be here.
I look at myself,
And wonder if maybe I deserve to die.
I sit and wonder,
If maybe,
Everyone will be better off without me.
Will I truly ever be happy?
Will I ever have love?
Will I ever love?
Then I look at little Drew,
And I see the innocence and trust.
I know that there is always some kind of love for me.
Such a tiny baby,
When he was born,
Now so long.
I know he loves me
In the way that only children can love.
I look at his mother,
My best friend,
And I see her love for me.
And I know that she will shed tears for me
Should I leave this world?
I look at my mother,
And wonder
What she would do without me
If I leave before her.
Then I look at Sonya,
And know that she to cares for me.
I know that she would feel the pain,
Like know one else,
Because that is her.
Then I once again look at myself.
I see what I can be,
With a little time and patience.
I know now that I have a bright future.
I hope and pray for God's guidance.
I have received it.
I am happy.
I am content.
I am,
I know that now.
I know that
Sonya will stand next to me,
Making me happy.
Drew will grow
And give me happiness
As he says his first word.
I know that my mother
Will help me through all
The hard ships that are to come.
I know that God and Jesus is next to me,
Whispering words of encouragement
As I walk down my chosen path.
I know that I have truly been blessed.
I have found myself,
Have you?

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