ลgǝи†.47
Codename 47
Jeremy Clarkson Car Quotes
[On a Ferrari]
“I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.”
[On the Porsche Boxster]
“It couldn’t pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.”
[When driving the Mercedes SLR McLaren through a tunnel]
“When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire.
But the German engineers from Mercedes said ‘Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!’
They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.”
[On Aston Martin]
“I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.
If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.”
“Speed has never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary… that’s what gets you.”
[On the Koenigsegg]
“Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable More comfortable than what… being stabbed?”
[On the TVR]
“Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.”
[On the Renault Clio V6]
“I think the problem is that it’s French. It’s a surrendermonkey.”
[On the Enzo Ferrari]
“I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing.”
[On the Porsche Cayenne]
“I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”
[On the Toyota Camry]
“Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.”
[On the BMW]
“If you were to buy a BMW 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.”
[On the Pagani]
“That [Pagani] Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.”
[On a Chevrolet Corvette]
“The Americans lecture the world on democracy and then won’t let me turn the traction control off!”
[On the Alfa Romeo Brera]
“Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste.
But you would, wouldn’t you?”
[On a Ferrari]
“I’d like to consider Ferrari as a scaled down version of God.”
[On the Porsche Boxster]
“It couldn’t pull a greased stick out of a pig’s bottom.”
[When driving the Mercedes SLR McLaren through a tunnel]
“When they debate as to what the sound of the SLR engine was akin to, the British engineers from McLaren said it sounded like a Spitfire.
But the German engineers from Mercedes said ‘Nein! Nein! Sounds like a Messerschmitt!’
They were both wrong. It sounds like the God of Thunder, gargling with nails.”
[On Aston Martin]
“I’m sorry, but having an Aston Martin DB9 on the drive and not driving it is a bit like having Keira Knightley in your bed and sleeping on the couch.
If you’ve got even half a scrotum it’s not going to happen.”
“Speed has never killed anyone, suddenly becoming stationary… that’s what gets you.”
[On the Koenigsegg]
“Koenigsegg are saying that the CCX is more comfortable More comfortable than what… being stabbed?”
[On the TVR]
“Owning a TVR in the past was like owning a bear. I mean it was great, until it pulled your head off, which it would.”
[On the Renault Clio V6]
“I think the problem is that it’s French. It’s a surrendermonkey.”
[On the Enzo Ferrari]
“I rang up Jay Kay, who’s got one, and said: “Can we borrow yours?” and he said, “Yeah, if I can borrow your daughter, because it amounts to the same thing.”
[On the Porsche Cayenne]
“I’ve seen gangrenous wounds better looking than this!”
[On the Toyota Camry]
“Whenever I’m suffering from insomnia, I just look at a picture of a Toyota Camry and I’m straight off.”
[On the BMW]
“If you were to buy a BMW 6-series, I recommend you select reverse when leaving friends’ houses so they don’t see its backside.”
[On the Pagani]
“That [Pagani] Zonda, really! It’s like a lion in orange dungarees. Kind of fierce, but ridiculous all at the same time.”
[On a Chevrolet Corvette]
“The Americans lecture the world on democracy and then won’t let me turn the traction control off!”
[On the Alfa Romeo Brera]
“Think of it as Angelina Jolie. You’ve heard she’s mad and eats nothing but wallpaper paste.
But you would, wouldn’t you?”
